a poem of therapeutic reflection / by I Begin Again

I’ve always enjoyed writing. As the years have gone on with wear and tear and even transformation, sometimes I forget to write. My mentor Lex Kogan always encouraged poetry even at the height of writer’s block. He also said it was important to share poetry. Sometimes I email them and am excited when I get a poem back. Poems by way of communication, he would call it. Poetry revolution, I would respond.

I feel that I will start posting some and I encourage you to send poems back to me.

sink slowly now 

the rain is louder when I'm inside

when I'm lying in bed and I can't get up

when I tell myself it's not depression, I tell myself I can fix it tomorrow 

it is dark at three thirty and I'm losing my will 
I think about screaming, but I quiet even the voice within 

greens are the same wherever one travels 

if you can hear me I would ask you to come back 

if you can hear me I would tell you I'm doing just fine

the apprentice became a mentor, but I have no one to teach

I downloaded your knowledge the best that I could

most of the time I am looking over my shoulder 

most of the time I am trying to find the right words 

it is a little elfin ego telling me I'm not alone

it is the same small elf that keeps me looking for what you left behind

most of my days are spent pretending I'm not grieving 

I found an underworld in this realm I still walk on

I hope you find it in the space you ended up in 

my mind is at peace when I hold my breath and sink 

the wizard's dust came knocking and I took a small step in

I'm writing this because I feel like I'm finally not angry 

I'm writing this to say I'm sorry I've been so mad 

into the flood waters and western galactic vignettes 

we break patterns and find the things we have tried to forget 

it's whale season now, i'm ready to pack my lungs with air